Post by Mischa is my life! on Jan 15, 2009 0:14:14 GMT
Copy/paste from the Marissa/Alex board....it's my first attempt guys...and it's a saaaaaaad fic I hope you'll read it...and like maybe xD
Title: Run…
^banner made by me
Rating: PG-13 [it’s about LOVE. And it’s about two women.]
Description: for now a one shot, song fiction written around Marissa and Alex in the moment they -have to- say goodbye to each other at the bonfire…it's Marissa's POV.
Warning it’s NOT happy Malex…it actually turned out sadder than I expected…sigh. Hope you can forgive me.
The song I drew inspiration from, as you may have guessed, is Run by Snow Patrol.
Find the lyrics here. Listen to it (watch the video) here.
(And to hear it from the lips of a girl, Leona Lewis’ version…beautiful as well).
Disclaimer: I do NOT own the song, I do NOT own the lyrics. I do NOT own Marissa/Alex…but they do own me…God knows if they do. If it’s a crime sue me, I am guilty.
A/N: ok so this is my VERY FIRST fiction…so be gentle pwease and also consider the fact that I am Italian, and even if I’ve been studying English for years it’s obviously not my first language. Hence, my apologies in advance for any grammar/syntax/whatever mistakes you may (you will) find. *blush*
Any kind of Feedback from you girls would mean the world to me…seriously…I have no idea if you might like this and I kind of..need to know my inspiration wasn’t just a waste of time…I don’t even know where this first attempt of mine will lead me…we’ve got heaps of tremendously talented ff writers here and I feel in such awe of them that this one shot will probably be the first and last thing you’ll ever read from me, lol. BUT still, comments = eye candies!!!
I = Marissa; you = Alex
Tell me one more time, remind me why you have to go…is it your work? Is it Newport? Maybe it’s me…I’ve been a total jerk to you in the last few weeks while you were just trying to love me…and now I realize. Bonfire’s ‘amazing’ everyone keeps saying, a total success…and all the merit goes to me. Me who? I feel so unbelievably alone in this crowded place without you. Ryan’s presence around is getting me on the nerve…I don’t like the way he looks at me…like I still belong to him. Years together and he’s still so clueless about me and what’s going on inside me, proved by the fact that he didn’t notice I’ve never been his. He says you’re just a ‘crush’…my ‘curious phase’, you know…I’m sure he’d ask to join us if he wasn’t intimidated by your badass and what you may do to give him a proper answer…Now I close my eyes, and I just feel bad for him because HE has been my ‘experimental game’, whereas it’s your name to be engraved in my heart…now and forever. I can feel your presence…you are here…I open my eyes and spot you from a considerable distance, as you make your way towards this racket and losing yourself among the people…random faces, strangers, the band, the cheerleaders, the booths. I don’t help, I let you find me…because even if I feel alive only when you’re around, this time I wish you weren’t here…and I know you’re not like him, I can’t fake with you…not even a smile. From the first moment our eyes met I was yours. And I would have never thought you could figure myself out with one single look of yours, and I would have never believed you could fall for me, too. Here you are, you found me, and are walking over me…I take in a deep breath, together with the gorgeous sight before me…I see you laying your eyes on me for the first time when it’s already been a while that I’m staring…when you open your mouth to speak I just die a little
“Hey..”
“Hi”
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done[/i]
“Wanna go somewhere more..private?”
“Congratulations, bonfire looks…”
“Amazing?”
“Well yeah..I was just gonna say that..you and Ryan have done an awesome job”
“Yeah…”
Few seconds are enough for you to read my soul and feel what I am feeling…before I can even look down and hide from you in all my guilt, you reach out for my hand and hold it tight in yours. I watch our fingers entwining at our sides and you drag me out of the crowd, to our favorite spot on the shore where that memorable night I tasted the tide turning on your lips. To no return. What have you done to me? I honestly don’t think I’ll survive if you leave me now, and I hate myself…I feel guilty, because I think if you go it’s because I wasn’t able to show you it’s your love that keeps me alive, it’s only you I breathe into my heart and how proud I am of belonging to you. Now another question is twisting my mind making me wonder if I ever deserved you at all. I can feel how much I hurt you, that’s why I am scared to even roam my eyes on your figure. Pain’s unbearable because I don’t have the strength to look at you but at the same time I am desperately longing for it. I need you…in your eyes my, our salvation lies.
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here[/i]
The nightly wind has messed up your hair and I dread I’m spoiling your endless Beauty, when with my trembling fingers I dare tucking a purple strand behind your ear…gently taking the chance to caress your soft skin one more time..one last time maybe. I feel my knees going further weak when to my surprise I realize you’re on the verge of crying too…I slowly squeeze my eyes, let a single tear stream down my cheek, and taste its salty flavour as it dies, sealed with a sob, on my lips. No, I can’t…I can’t…I’m not strong enough to look at you in the eye right now…I know I would die if I did it, because you would pierce my soul…your eyes…no matter how many times I told you how completely disarmed they have me…a deep blue Ocean in which I used to get lost, together with you..but it feels like I’m drowning now…slowly losing your hand through the waves, and yet, as I go down the only sure thing I know is that my place in the world is nowhere but at your side…I just want to stare at your face for the rest of my days, but why can’t I…? And once again, it’s myself I see in your stormy eyes…
To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do…[/i]
“I’m so sorry…if only…I wish things were easier…”
You look away and close your eyes in a silent nod, with your lips pressed to keep in your words, your reasons, your pain. It’s unbelievable how you’re still acting like you don’t want to hurt me, after all that I’m putting you through. I never thought I could affect you this much…I never thought you would change my life and turn my world upside down the way you did…I suddenly pull closer, needing to feel you. I try to speak and despite my mind’s overloaded with thoughts, words won’t come out…
“I…”
“shh…”
You are right. I have always been an open book to you, and I’ve always been able to read your mind…even before I knew you…since that night at The Bait Shop, when Jodie was annoying you with her questions and you were saved by a bell that happened to be me…I will never forget the way you looked at me when I was glad to cut into a conversation ‘you didn’t wanna have’….still gives me chills. There is no need of words right now, but I wish I could hush your tears….never before had I seen you crying…I am the softy, I am the sap…I’m the one who cries if a movie doesn’t have its happy ending…”I’m a badass. Sorry but there’s no way you will ever see me crying baby.” This what you told me…and you have no idea how bad I wish you were right, now…we’re a few inches away, your eyes are still shut and I can’t force myself to pull away…I instinctively remember what you used to do with me and barely graze your wet cheek brushing lightly my thumb on your skin to wipe away a new born tear. You slightly gulp under my touch and with your eyes now half lidded I dare moving even closer, right in front of you, while my hands cup sweetly your face…
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say[/i]
“Marissa” you breathe
“Alex” I whisper
I let out a sad sigh before you rest your forehead against mine…now it’s my eyes to be closed but I can feel your gaze getting me everywhere…the next thing I feel is the touch of your lips on my cheek, killing a tear that has been shed for you, and while I wonder if it’s the same salty flavour you’re tasting on me, you place another gentle kiss on my chin…and another one...you start wiping away all my tears…lightly..and then as my sobs increase and mix with yours, your kisses become eager, my tears die into you before they can even burst out…oh, if only you could kiss away the pain…
Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads[/i]
What are we doing…we’d better stop we need to stop, and I know there is only one way to. If this is a goodbye, if I have to die I want to do it in the best way I know…with my lips attached to yours, until I’ll be faded into you completely. Out of all this mess you are the only certain thing I know…the only one that keeps me going. Be my rest, be my peace. Be mine. So many things I’d like to tell you right now but instead I just kiss you hard, with everything I’ve got in me, tasting Heaven and fearing Hell at the same time, but more than ever determined to keep with me as much as I can of you. I feel you kissing me with the same violence and neither of us seem to pull away…it’s not air I need to breathe, it’s you…God it’s you… and it’s in all this craziness that I can’t figure out anymore where you end and where I do start, being one with you in the darkness. My hands find yours, our fingers lace slowly and I gently bring them up to rest over my heart that under this Harbor sweater beats for you and you only. I sprawl our fists on my chest as both our gazes follow my moves
“Are you gonna ask it back?”
“My heart, your key..I can’t think of a safer place where to leave it...it’s yours.”
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess[/i]
The bonfire party is going on few miles away but all I hear is us, and I am blinded to the rest of the world as you hold me one last time into your safe arms…I am so afraid of living without you I don’t think I could make it a single day. You entered my life so quickly, and even quicker you became the best thing that ever happened to me. You taught me how to trust myself, you only have been my strength…there’s no point in holding on tight if I cannot hear your voice everyday…if our souls are apart. And so I stay here, unable to move, I see your eyes on me but for the first time I can’t guess what’s going on your mind right now…I just keep basking into my Love for you…the same love that now feeds me will kill me tomorrow when you’ll be gone. The fireworks have just begun and though it’s like we’re sitting on a beach oceans away, one suddenly lights up your face. Your breathtaking features shine into the night and I can’t help but smiling at how beautiful you are.
“You sure you don’t you wanna have a look? It’s your party after all..fireworks are beautiful”
“My eyes are already laying on the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen”
…and its so obvious I don’t have eyes for anything else right now. You brought me to life…and so far, like I had never let anyone before. I wonder if you know how much you mean to me, I should have shown you before, when we were still in time, that you do fit in my life, because you ARE my life. Are you aware of the fact that I will never forget you? That it won’t get better in time that these wounds won’t heal that walking out of my life won’t make me move on from the love of my life that no one could ever replace you in my heart…Oh my God…I have to say goodbye to the only thing that makes this life worth living, I feel like I’m driving insane. You know what I need the most in this very moment? You know that I would die now just to hear you saying…
“I Love You Ris…”
“Ti Amo Lex.”
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear…
THE END.
Title: Run…
^banner made by me
Rating: PG-13 [it’s about LOVE. And it’s about two women.]
Description: for now a one shot, song fiction written around Marissa and Alex in the moment they -have to- say goodbye to each other at the bonfire…it's Marissa's POV.
Warning it’s NOT happy Malex…it actually turned out sadder than I expected…sigh. Hope you can forgive me.
The song I drew inspiration from, as you may have guessed, is Run by Snow Patrol.
Find the lyrics here. Listen to it (watch the video) here.
(And to hear it from the lips of a girl, Leona Lewis’ version…beautiful as well).
Disclaimer: I do NOT own the song, I do NOT own the lyrics. I do NOT own Marissa/Alex…but they do own me…God knows if they do. If it’s a crime sue me, I am guilty.
A/N: ok so this is my VERY FIRST fiction…so be gentle pwease and also consider the fact that I am Italian, and even if I’ve been studying English for years it’s obviously not my first language. Hence, my apologies in advance for any grammar/syntax/whatever mistakes you may (you will) find. *blush*
Any kind of Feedback from you girls would mean the world to me…seriously…I have no idea if you might like this and I kind of..need to know my inspiration wasn’t just a waste of time…I don’t even know where this first attempt of mine will lead me…we’ve got heaps of tremendously talented ff writers here and I feel in such awe of them that this one shot will probably be the first and last thing you’ll ever read from me, lol. BUT still, comments = eye candies!!!
I = Marissa; you = Alex
Tell me one more time, remind me why you have to go…is it your work? Is it Newport? Maybe it’s me…I’ve been a total jerk to you in the last few weeks while you were just trying to love me…and now I realize. Bonfire’s ‘amazing’ everyone keeps saying, a total success…and all the merit goes to me. Me who? I feel so unbelievably alone in this crowded place without you. Ryan’s presence around is getting me on the nerve…I don’t like the way he looks at me…like I still belong to him. Years together and he’s still so clueless about me and what’s going on inside me, proved by the fact that he didn’t notice I’ve never been his. He says you’re just a ‘crush’…my ‘curious phase’, you know…I’m sure he’d ask to join us if he wasn’t intimidated by your badass and what you may do to give him a proper answer…Now I close my eyes, and I just feel bad for him because HE has been my ‘experimental game’, whereas it’s your name to be engraved in my heart…now and forever. I can feel your presence…you are here…I open my eyes and spot you from a considerable distance, as you make your way towards this racket and losing yourself among the people…random faces, strangers, the band, the cheerleaders, the booths. I don’t help, I let you find me…because even if I feel alive only when you’re around, this time I wish you weren’t here…and I know you’re not like him, I can’t fake with you…not even a smile. From the first moment our eyes met I was yours. And I would have never thought you could figure myself out with one single look of yours, and I would have never believed you could fall for me, too. Here you are, you found me, and are walking over me…I take in a deep breath, together with the gorgeous sight before me…I see you laying your eyes on me for the first time when it’s already been a while that I’m staring…when you open your mouth to speak I just die a little
“Hey..”
“Hi”
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done[/i]
“Wanna go somewhere more..private?”
“Congratulations, bonfire looks…”
“Amazing?”
“Well yeah..I was just gonna say that..you and Ryan have done an awesome job”
“Yeah…”
Few seconds are enough for you to read my soul and feel what I am feeling…before I can even look down and hide from you in all my guilt, you reach out for my hand and hold it tight in yours. I watch our fingers entwining at our sides and you drag me out of the crowd, to our favorite spot on the shore where that memorable night I tasted the tide turning on your lips. To no return. What have you done to me? I honestly don’t think I’ll survive if you leave me now, and I hate myself…I feel guilty, because I think if you go it’s because I wasn’t able to show you it’s your love that keeps me alive, it’s only you I breathe into my heart and how proud I am of belonging to you. Now another question is twisting my mind making me wonder if I ever deserved you at all. I can feel how much I hurt you, that’s why I am scared to even roam my eyes on your figure. Pain’s unbearable because I don’t have the strength to look at you but at the same time I am desperately longing for it. I need you…in your eyes my, our salvation lies.
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here[/i]
The nightly wind has messed up your hair and I dread I’m spoiling your endless Beauty, when with my trembling fingers I dare tucking a purple strand behind your ear…gently taking the chance to caress your soft skin one more time..one last time maybe. I feel my knees going further weak when to my surprise I realize you’re on the verge of crying too…I slowly squeeze my eyes, let a single tear stream down my cheek, and taste its salty flavour as it dies, sealed with a sob, on my lips. No, I can’t…I can’t…I’m not strong enough to look at you in the eye right now…I know I would die if I did it, because you would pierce my soul…your eyes…no matter how many times I told you how completely disarmed they have me…a deep blue Ocean in which I used to get lost, together with you..but it feels like I’m drowning now…slowly losing your hand through the waves, and yet, as I go down the only sure thing I know is that my place in the world is nowhere but at your side…I just want to stare at your face for the rest of my days, but why can’t I…? And once again, it’s myself I see in your stormy eyes…
To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do…[/i]
“I’m so sorry…if only…I wish things were easier…”
You look away and close your eyes in a silent nod, with your lips pressed to keep in your words, your reasons, your pain. It’s unbelievable how you’re still acting like you don’t want to hurt me, after all that I’m putting you through. I never thought I could affect you this much…I never thought you would change my life and turn my world upside down the way you did…I suddenly pull closer, needing to feel you. I try to speak and despite my mind’s overloaded with thoughts, words won’t come out…
“I…”
“shh…”
You are right. I have always been an open book to you, and I’ve always been able to read your mind…even before I knew you…since that night at The Bait Shop, when Jodie was annoying you with her questions and you were saved by a bell that happened to be me…I will never forget the way you looked at me when I was glad to cut into a conversation ‘you didn’t wanna have’….still gives me chills. There is no need of words right now, but I wish I could hush your tears….never before had I seen you crying…I am the softy, I am the sap…I’m the one who cries if a movie doesn’t have its happy ending…”I’m a badass. Sorry but there’s no way you will ever see me crying baby.” This what you told me…and you have no idea how bad I wish you were right, now…we’re a few inches away, your eyes are still shut and I can’t force myself to pull away…I instinctively remember what you used to do with me and barely graze your wet cheek brushing lightly my thumb on your skin to wipe away a new born tear. You slightly gulp under my touch and with your eyes now half lidded I dare moving even closer, right in front of you, while my hands cup sweetly your face…
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say[/i]
“Marissa” you breathe
“Alex” I whisper
I let out a sad sigh before you rest your forehead against mine…now it’s my eyes to be closed but I can feel your gaze getting me everywhere…the next thing I feel is the touch of your lips on my cheek, killing a tear that has been shed for you, and while I wonder if it’s the same salty flavour you’re tasting on me, you place another gentle kiss on my chin…and another one...you start wiping away all my tears…lightly..and then as my sobs increase and mix with yours, your kisses become eager, my tears die into you before they can even burst out…oh, if only you could kiss away the pain…
Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads[/i]
What are we doing…we’d better stop we need to stop, and I know there is only one way to. If this is a goodbye, if I have to die I want to do it in the best way I know…with my lips attached to yours, until I’ll be faded into you completely. Out of all this mess you are the only certain thing I know…the only one that keeps me going. Be my rest, be my peace. Be mine. So many things I’d like to tell you right now but instead I just kiss you hard, with everything I’ve got in me, tasting Heaven and fearing Hell at the same time, but more than ever determined to keep with me as much as I can of you. I feel you kissing me with the same violence and neither of us seem to pull away…it’s not air I need to breathe, it’s you…God it’s you… and it’s in all this craziness that I can’t figure out anymore where you end and where I do start, being one with you in the darkness. My hands find yours, our fingers lace slowly and I gently bring them up to rest over my heart that under this Harbor sweater beats for you and you only. I sprawl our fists on my chest as both our gazes follow my moves
“Are you gonna ask it back?”
“My heart, your key..I can’t think of a safer place where to leave it...it’s yours.”
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess[/i]
The bonfire party is going on few miles away but all I hear is us, and I am blinded to the rest of the world as you hold me one last time into your safe arms…I am so afraid of living without you I don’t think I could make it a single day. You entered my life so quickly, and even quicker you became the best thing that ever happened to me. You taught me how to trust myself, you only have been my strength…there’s no point in holding on tight if I cannot hear your voice everyday…if our souls are apart. And so I stay here, unable to move, I see your eyes on me but for the first time I can’t guess what’s going on your mind right now…I just keep basking into my Love for you…the same love that now feeds me will kill me tomorrow when you’ll be gone. The fireworks have just begun and though it’s like we’re sitting on a beach oceans away, one suddenly lights up your face. Your breathtaking features shine into the night and I can’t help but smiling at how beautiful you are.
“You sure you don’t you wanna have a look? It’s your party after all..fireworks are beautiful”
“My eyes are already laying on the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen”
…and its so obvious I don’t have eyes for anything else right now. You brought me to life…and so far, like I had never let anyone before. I wonder if you know how much you mean to me, I should have shown you before, when we were still in time, that you do fit in my life, because you ARE my life. Are you aware of the fact that I will never forget you? That it won’t get better in time that these wounds won’t heal that walking out of my life won’t make me move on from the love of my life that no one could ever replace you in my heart…Oh my God…I have to say goodbye to the only thing that makes this life worth living, I feel like I’m driving insane. You know what I need the most in this very moment? You know that I would die now just to hear you saying…
“I Love You Ris…”
“Ti Amo Lex.”
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear…
THE END.